DUDE GOES LORENA BOBBITT ON HIMSELF

I got a few emails telling me to comment on this. I would prefer not to, but I know that people like Kevin in Santa Barbara won't stop sending me emails about this until I say something.

PHNOM PENH (Reuters) - A Cambodian man cut off his penis when he said he was visited by four hungry spirits in a dream and he had no chicken or duck to offer them.

According to police, 33-year-old Soun Ney told the spirits to go away when they first appeared to ask for food, and waved his penis at them in defiance.

"Devils, I don't have any chicken or duck for you," he was quoted as saying by local police chief Phoeung Vat. "If you want to eat anything, you can eat my penis."

Now I've never been confronted by hungry spirits in the middle of the night. I'd like to think that I'd explore other options of food before severing an appendage. I don't understand how this thought process works. "Chicken? no. Duck? no. Penis? yes!".

Soun Ney said the spirits agreed to eat his penis. He was rushed to a hospital near the capital Phnom Penh after he castrated himself with a butcher's knife.

The spirits "agreed" to eat his penis. I wonder how much convincing it took.

"He is lucky to be alive," Phoeung Vat told Reuters.

I'm not sure I'd want to be alive after this.

Villagers in the deeply impoverished southeast Asian traditionally offer chicken, duck or cake to the spirits of the dead to ward off bad luck.

I noticed that it doesn't mention whether or not villagers traditionally offer spirits their severed genitals.

Okay I talked about it. Now can we go back to sports?